Unnamed Bandits

Ant Kingdom, Theater

[Quest: Theater Help Wanted!]

Narration: Once upon a time, there laid a kingdom in a desert with an immense oasis.

Narration: Travelers from all over the world wished to visit. For its clear water and its beautiful ruler.

Narration: The princess would greet all who came with smiles and hospitality.

Narration: It was so, how an evil prince fell in love...

Chubee: I cannot leave my people. They are my pride, my joy!

Burglar: Oh, how I wished for thee to make this easy.

Burglar: You have left me no choice!

Chubee: No... Stop, stop!

Leif: Halt, you fiend! You will sully the princess no longer!

Vi: Yeah! Uh, give her back!

(minibubble) Kabbu: (She forgot her lines...!)

Kabbu: W-We will stop you!

Burglar: Minions! Get rid of these pests. We have places to be.

Chubee: H-Help me! Somebody save me!

Vi: Alright, let's kick their butt!

(minibubble) Kabbu: Sigh...

Leif: You freakish beasts, you dare stand between us and the princess!?

Leif: You chose poorly. Prepare yourself!

[After winning first battle]

Leif: Curses! That villain escaped with the princess.

Kabbu: Whatever shall we do now? How will we face the people!?

Vi: We will get her back! After them!

Narration: The unlikely heroes left their loved homeland behind, with the princess in their heart.

Narration: The journey was long, and the desert unforgiving...

Kabbu: Water... Oh gods, guide us to water...

Leif: Do not complain! Our suffering is slim, compared to what the princess faces.

Vi: Ugh, I bet she's getting treated real nice.

(minibubble) Chubee: (V-Vi! What are you doing?!)

Kabbu: Oh, bandits! We are in such trouble!

Leif: Out of our way, scoundrels. We have no time for thee.

Vi: Yeah! Or face my beemerang! I mean, blade!

Thief: Nyehehe. You shouldn't have come to the desert…

Bandit: ...In such expensive clothes!

Leif: Your greed knows no end... Prepare yourself!

Narration: Stifling heat and frigid nights were no match for the knights' spirit. They reached the prince's lair with fire in their eyes.

Narration: And now, it was time to take back what they had lost...

Chubee: Let me go already, you monster!

Burglar: Even with all my riches, with the grandeur of my land…

Burglar: You would still reject me!?

Kabbu: Oh, the evil prince. He is so scary and imposing!

Vi: Hey! Give the princess back!

Leif: You will pay for your crimes!

Chubee: My knights! You've come to my aid!

Burglar: Why... Why must fate work against me?

Burglar: Very well. I shall end thee, and take all I want by force!

[After winning third battle]

Burglar: No...I can still fight!

Burglar: I will show you my true power!

Leif: No... We are too drained from the fight!

Kabbu: Is this the end for us...?

Vi: Hey, I can still fight!

Burglar: AAAAAAAAAAAA-

Chubee: That is for kidnapping me, you cruel tyrant!

Crowd: WOOOOO!

Chubee: Oh, my knights...I thank you for all you have done.

Chubee: In the name of my mother, the Queen...I grant you the highest honors.

Chubee: To stay by my side as right-hand bugs, as we restore our kingdom.

Leif: It was all for you, Princess.

Chubee: Heheh. I knew I could count on ya! It went great!

Leif: It went way better than great.

Kabbu: I didn't really like my role, but I managed.

Vi: It was super easy. Now, for payment…

Chubee: It's a bit weird to be paying Team Snakemouth! Heheheh...

Vi: Nyehehehe. Thanks, Chubee.

Chubee: Honestly, a lot of people are asking for an encore.

Chubee: Guess I'll stay till they're bored!

Lost Sands, Caravan

[Story, ch3, walking up to group]

Cricketly: Oh, if it isn't those peppy explorers!

Vi: Hiya!

Eri: Hey, Team Snakemouth. How's it going?

Leif: Well, it's a bit hot…

Kabbu: You're traveling to Defiant Root as well?

Gen: Yup. We're on a mission to protect these merchants!

Cricketly: Specifically, our dear Snail. We could fight or run, but this one's pretty wimpy.

Eri: It's been a super good day, though. Easiest mission we've ever had!

Burglar: EHEHEHE! YOU JINXED IT!

Gen: Dangit, Eri!

Vi: Bandits!

Cricketly: You've got some NERVE trying to mug us!

Huscada: D-Dear, it's okay. We can make the money back. Don't get hurt fo-

Cricketly: As if! I'd rather go down fighting than yield to these scoundrels!

Wasp: You speak brave words, for a powerless merchant.

Wasp: This is your last chance to surrender to the Wasp Kingdom!

Gen: L-Like we'd let you take anything!

Eri: Yeah, it's time to s-show what we can do!

Burglar: Bleheheh. Merchants are so greedy. Can't share just a few things. Now we're gonna have to take it all!

(minibubble) Huscada: Oh no, oh no!

Wasp: Hmm? Those three! They're the ones from the report!

Burglar: That'll pay a pretty penny! Let's capture 'em!

Kabbu: You will keep your vile limbs away from my friends!

Vi: Let's kick their butt!

(minibubble) Eri: L-let's go!

[Post-battle]

Wasp: Blast! We've got to go back and report this!

Burglar: I'm, uh, still getting paid, right...?

Wasp: Shut it! Let's go!

Wasp: You... We won't forget this!

Huscada: Uff... That was terrifying. Thank you…

Gen: Yeah. Thanks, Team Snakemouth!

Cricketly: Hmph. We were going to be fine. They were weaklings.

Vi: You're welcome.

Vi: ...Those wasps are showing up more, huh?

Leif: It's worrying indeed. We should report this as soon as we're able.

Huscada: We're just humble merchants. We can't help too much…

Huscada: But we are so very grateful for your help. This isn't much, but take it.

Vi: Woah! I didn't even need to ask this time!

(minibubble) Kabbu: Oh, Vi...

Cricketly: Of course. You won't find merchants in debt. With this, we're even.

Eri: We can keep the merchants safe from here. We're almost at the town!

Gen: Yeah. Don't let us slow you down!

Kabbu: You would never! But thank you. We'll keep going now.

Huscada: Safe travels!

Lost Sands, Oasis

[first talk]

Burglar: Urp… that was a total failure. The boss will have at me!

Burglar: I just hope he can manage to trick some chumps at the well.

Kabbu: Excuse me, sir. Are you alright?

Burglar: Oh, yeah. I am alri-

Burglar: E-EEEEEEEERR...

Kabbu: Is something wrong?

Burglar: I-it's nothing, bud! J-Just taking a break here near the water! Ahahahaha...!

(minibubble) Burglar: (They don't remember me?)

Leif: Uh. Sure thing, "bud".

[talk again]

Burglar: T-there is nothing we should talk about! Just let me take a rest here...!

Kabbu: Oh, uh, alright. Excuse us.

Bandit Hideout, Entrance

[Story, first entrance, Examine Key]

Vi: This was super easy!

Kabbu: ...Something feels off, doesn't it?

Leif: It's definitely too quiet in her-

Bandits: We got them! We got them!

(minibubble) Vi: My fur!

Bandits: These are the ones the wasps want, aren't they?

(minibubble) Kabbu: V-Vi! Leif!

Bandits: Shove them in the dungeon, take their stuff! We eat as kings tonight!

(minibubble) Leif: Unhand us!

Bandits: A ha ha ha ha!

Bandit Hideout, Cafeteria

[Before retrieving items, walk across rafters]

Burglar: Those wasps be getting on my nerves!

Bandit: Hmph. They act so invincible... Didn't they fail their assault on the Bee power plant?

Thief: Don't worry. Boss can handle 'em. We've just gotta hang in there!

Burglar: As if the Boss wasn't busy enough…

Leif: So that's what happened at the factory…

Kabbu: Shh! Valuable information, true... But we must not be found out!

Vi: I don't think the Beemerang's gonna be in a cafeteria. Let's look elsewhere!

Cook: Hey hey! Time out! I'm not here to fight. I'm just a humble cook. Please don't disturb me.

Bandit Hideout, Storage

Thief: Oi, oi. What ya mean ya haven't got no berries yet?

Wasp scout: You will be paid when the job is completed.

Thief: We snuck you in, and helped you secure materials.

Bandit: You think we're dumb? The job's way past done!

Wasp trooper: Watch your tone, thieves.

Thief: You want to fight here? It ain't gonna end well for you!

Wasp scout: Tch. We'd best go report this.

Bandit: Wait! We ain't finished here!

Sign: Remember to put all important treasure in the Boss' room!

Sign: If you knuckleheads forgot, it is on the upper floor! Don't disappoint the boss!

Bandit Hideout, Entrance

[post-Astotheles battle]

Astotheles: ...I yield. I can fight no longer. That wench's got good eyes for minions…

Astotheles: Do it, then. End me.

Kabbu: You got the fair fight you requested. That's enough.

Leif: A smackdown is good enough for us.

(minibubble) Astotheles: ...!

Vi: Yeah! Don't be so dramatic! We just want the key!

Bandit, offscreen: BOSS!!!

Thief: Y-You're hurt!

Bandit: Boss, why didn't you call us? We coulda handled these chumps!

Burglar: And we still can. Let's get 'em, boys!

Leif: Tch. After such a tough fight…

Astotheles: Enough!

Astotheles: We bet our honor in battle, and I lost. They're free to go.

Bandit: Seriously, boss? We can take 'em!

Astotheles: ...It's okay, friends. The gardens bloom, do they not? And we drove the wasps out.

Astotheles: There's no point in keeping them here any longer.

Vi: So you've come around? You could've just let us go, you know?

Burglar: I don't get ya sometimes, boss…

Astotheles: You three. You're against the Wasps, correct?

Kabbu: Indeed. They are a threat to all of Bugaria.

Astotheles: Then you may not be so bad. Maybe I can trust you with this.

Astotheles: We don't owe the Ant Kingdom even one blade of grass…

Astotheles: But those Wasps betrayed our covenant. They are lower than dirt.

Astotheles: I hope they'll meet justice at your hands. We don't have the time or resources to go after them.

Leif: If we do, don't think it's to do you a favor.

Astotheles: With that key, your mercy is repaid. Now, get out. If you come back, we'll throw you in that cell again.

(minibubble) Vi: We'd break out again!

Bandit: You heard the boss! Get out! Don't make us kick ya!

Leif: You bandits have got some swinging moods.

Vi: I don't get it... Are they good or bad?

Kabbu: Come, Vi. I don't think that's an answer we'll get today...

Outskirts, East

[Quest: Help Me Get it Back!]

Mun: G-give it back!

Burglar: Huh, punk!?

Mun: E-Eophi's mask! The leaf mask you stole!

Bandit: Pfft. We put that in the vault LONG ago.

Bandit: Even if we didn't, we're not gonna give it back!

Burglar: Yeah, punk. What ya gonna do about it, HUH?

Mun: I...I...I'll beat you up! I'll really do it!

Bandit: HAHAHAHA!!!

Burglar: You're gonna fight us, punk!? Gonna hit us with your shaking legs?

Bandit: You ain't getting that mask back, worm. Just forget about it!

Mun: ...

Mun: *Sniff*...I-I really can't do it…

Mun: I'll never get back his mask like this…

Mun: I...I'm gonna have to ask for help!

Bandit Hideout, Storage

[Quest: Help Me Get It Back!]

Mun: O-Oi! I hope you're ready to pay!

Bandit: What!? You followed us, punk!?

Burglar: ...And he's got help with him!

Thief: Hah. Think we're scared cuz you're not alone!?

Mun: Y-You're only brave when you pick on others! This is fair game!

Burglar: S-Shut up!

Thief: A-Aren't those the one that fought the boss?

Bandit: That's perfect. We'll beat these punks up and get a reward!

Kabbu: Hmph. Your boss would be most disappointed in you, I'm sure.

Leif: You sure about that one, Kabbu?

Vi: Whatever. Let's go!

Mun: HIYAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

[post-battle]

Mun: AHHHH!! HAH! TORYAH!!!!

Vi: W-What are ya doing?

Mun: ...O-Oh! Woah! We did it! We beat 'em up!

Leif: Err-

Kabbu: Y-Yes. We couldn't have done it without you, brave lad!

Bandit: P-Punk...

Mun: That was awesome! We did it!

Vi: Y-Yup.

Mun: I'm gonna go tell Eophi I beat up all the bad guys! Wow!

Mun: Thank you so much!!!

Vi: O-Oi! The reward!

Kabbu: Do you really-

Vi: YES! This was a tough one!

Leif: If you really want one, guess you can go ask him back in town.

Rubber Prison, Cells Vertical

Burglar: My sentence is over in two days, no way I'm escaping now, go away!

[post-ch6]

Burglar: Great, because of that ruckus my sentence got extended! And I was about to get out too...

Rubber Prison, Third Floor

[post-ch6]

Ant Guard: No means no! Until you pay off the machine you broke, you can't go back in!

Burglar: Are you serious!? Community Service doesn't pay well at all!

Rubber Prison, Gym

Burglar: Hehe. You look like fresh meat. What are you in for?

Burglar: Huh, what? You're explorers? Uhhh... I said nothing, I'm innocent. I swear!

Bandit: All I wanted was just to eat good food for no effort. Joined the bandits, then ended here.

Bandit: And you know what? This is much better than I imagined. I wish I was arrested sooner.

Thief: I was sure I'd get beaten up for being a pushover. I mean, it definitively happened, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it'd would be.

Npc Spies

[Lost Sands, Oasis: Burglar]

Kabbu: Haven't we met this fellow?

Vi: Something's very familiar about him, for sure!

Leif: (They can't tell?)

[Bandit Hideout, Cafeteria: Cook]

Vi: A bandit!

Leif: Chill, Vi. He doesn't seem to want to fight.

Kabbu: Indeed. We can't just go around hitting everyone!

Vi: Hmph!

[Rubber Prison, Cells Vertical]

Vi: It's kinda weird to not have to fight.

Kabbu: Some people do regret their actions. We must allow them to make amends.

Leif: ...At least while their crimes are small enough to forgive.

[Rubber Prison, Third Floor]

Vi: So prisoners can earn berries, huh.

Leif: Cheap labor for the good of those they've wronged.

Kabbu: Well, something good's come out of villainy...

[Rubber Prison, Gym: Burglar]

Leif: Didn't we meet this one in the Bandits' Hideout?

Kabbu: Hm? We didn't turn any of them in, though…

Vi: Wonder what he did to end up here…

[Rubber Prison, Gym: Bandit]

Kabbu: S-Someone who enjoys prison!?

Vi: Well, there's free food!

Kabbu: How could that possibly be a good enough reason!?

Leif: Uh oh. Kabbu's having a crisis…

[Rubber Prison, Gym: Thief]

Vi: Prison's rough for the weak villains, huh.

Kabbu: Sadly, not many think about that before ending up here...